Begin Again.

Wow it's been so long. A lot has changed and of course, a lot more will be changing soon so I was thinking that maybe I'd start this again and preserve my sanity.

It's been a good year.

I was just going over old posts ( I felt the need to review the days surrounding Riley's birth, for obvious reasons.) and realized that in 2006 I had like 57 posts and I've had significantly less since. There doesn't seem to be any for 2007...did I not write? I guess not. I posted a few things on my myspace blog, but nothing important. I've been feeling so frustrated with my sister and her teenage crap that I've written a few things to her there, but nothing really interesting.

To be clear, I am starting this again to document the birth of our next child. I want to be sure that there are blog posts and pictures and everything that Riley got. Recent events, and the fact that this is the second baby will not deter from the excitement of this baby. Not if I have anything to do with it. This is our baby. And he is important.

And being a boy is not a bad thing. I hate that stigma. The world needs more good men. I'd go on to have 20 sons if I could physically, emotionally, and financially handle it. Would buying some pink stuff be fun? Sure. But depriving the world of my awesome offspring is simply not an option. There will be one more. I have to fulfill my duty.

Ugh...that's my vent. At least a semi-vent as that's all I can appropriately get out. Otherwise, I'd have to go into details that are just not pretty and really, in my position, better left ignored. I am doing my absolute best to do that. And so with that, I will never speak of it again.

Unless something new happens. No...not even then. Well maybe. It depends on the severity.

So! We are staying at Josh's mom's. Don't laugh...jerk. It was a choice, and we're very grateful for it. See, Josh and I are very hard-core about getting out of debt, and we're doing awesome. Soon enough we will be completely free and have his entire salary at our disposal. We didn't know when we talked to her about moving in that we were going to have another baby. Oops. But it's turned out for the best because at least we won't have a huge financial stress on top of the stress of bringing another human life into the world.

But...Jax is dearly missed. My one huge regret. At least I know he's in a good home.

It should also be mentioned that our first son is still the most amazing, beautiful child ever born. I don't care who in this world breeds, until April 28th, there will not be a more astounding child. Sometimes, I honestly worry about the other baby living up to his awesome-ness. I'm told this is normal, though. Of course this baby will rock the world, he's ours.

As far as this pregnancy goes, it's been really easy. I've also been extremely healthy and I think have experience (and of course, God) to thank for that. I've been fortunate enough not to have gained any personal weight; I've even lost some. The baby and I are diabetes free, which is awesome, for lack of a better word. The only downside to that being I never get to see him. We had an ultra sound early on in which the technician seemed to predict that the baby is a male. I didn't believe it at first, because I had such a strong feeling that it would be a girl, but I've since given in to the fact that the technician is a professional and I'll just have to take her word for it for now. Oddly enough, I still have dreams that when I have the baby, it's a girl and I'm totally unprepared. It's so strange to me because I felt Riley so strongly. I knew he was a boy, I knew his name, he had a very strong personality even before birth. He was just...a presence. And maybe it's because I saw him every week in the ultra sounds, or because he was physically so big, or maybe even because I wasn't distracted by anything while I was pregnant with him. Let's just say, this one is different. I'm totally cool with it being a boy. I know boys. I can handle this. Besides, like I said, the world is certainly in need of good men.

Anyway, if anyone is interested or still reads this, I will hopefully be back to write more and more as the baby comes and of course, there will be pictures. =] Also, Josh has started a blog that is all about Riley, you can probably find the link from his page.

Until then, I'm taking a nap.